Zane's Erotica Noir-Oct/Nov 1998

Zane's Erotica Noir eMonthly
October/November 1998

Endeavors Erotica Newsletter
Volume Five
Part One
October/November 1998

Welcome to the 5th Volume of my erotica newsletter !
If you would like to be removed from my mailing list, simply put
"REMOVE ME" in the subject line and email me at endeavors@aol.com
If you would like to be added to my mailing list, simply put "ADD ME TO YOUR LIST" in the subject line and email me at endeavors@aol.com
This newsletter is in two parts. If you only receive one of them, let me know.

In this issue, you will find:

PART ONE
Sexual Questions of the Month
Sex Gadget of the Month
Book of the Month
Herbal Aphrodisiacs
Peaches and Cream by SINSUALWMN@aol.com
The Barber Shop by Zane

PART TWO
Web Sites of the Month
Links to Stories by NJBLKLOVE
Homonymic Orgasms
Nymph by Zane

Enjoy this month's newsletter and see you next month !
Peace,
Zane

Sexual Questions of the Month
1) Q: I've heard women can ejaculate. Is this true? And how can it be done?
A: Yes, like men, women are able to expel fluid at moments of passion. This occurs only after continuous and ardent stimulation of the urethal sponge, a.k.a. the G-spot.

2) Q: I saw a product called Mandelay at the drugstore. What is it?
A: The aptly named Mandelay is a "male genital desensitizer" manufactured by the Majestic Drug Co., Inc., in the Bronx, NY. A four-ounce tube costs about $5.99 retail. Apply a drop or two of the water-soluble gel on the head of the penis before you put on a rubber. It absorbs quickly, is odorless and tasteless and numbs him enough to gain an extra ten minutes of sex.

Sex Gadget of the Month
The pinky-sized vibrator can be strapped on under clothes for instant self-pleasuring. A remote control lets the wearer decide when to let the juices flow.

Book of the Month
How to Have an Orgasm As OftenYou Want by Rachel Swift
(Carroll & Graf, 1993)

Herbal Aphrodisiacs
Damiana - Known in Latin as Turner aphrodisiaca, this herb has a long-lasting reputation as a sexual stimulant. Damiana contains volatile oils that stimulate nerve endings and increase circulation to the urinogenital tract. (Steep one to two teaspoons of dried damiana leaves in one cup of boiling water for 10 to 15 minutes. Drink one to three times a day.)

Saw Palmetto - Nineteenth-century herbalists recommended saw palmetto to increase libido. Modern research suggests that a compound called beta-sitosterol, which it contains, keeps the sex hormone testosterone circulating to the body longer than usual. (Comes in tincture or pill form. Take 1,200-1,800 mg three times a day.)

Ginseng - Asian cultures have long used ginseng as a tonic for male potency and longevity, and many herbalists believe it can benefit women too. It appears to act on the endocrine glands, resulting in increased stamina and a sense of alertness and well-being. (Stir half a teaspoon of ginseng tincture in a glass of juice.)

Chinese Angelica - This herb, also known as dong quai, is considered by the Chinese to be an all-around sexual tonic for both men and women. It's also frequently used to alleviate the symptoms of PMS and menopause, perhaps because it contains phytoestrogen, the plant form of the hormone estrogen. It should not be taken if you are pregnant. (Steep three to six teaspoons of the powdered root in a pint of boiling water for 15 minutes. Drink up to three cups a day.)

NOTE: Most of these herbs are available in pill form.

PEACHES AND CREAM
By SINSUALWMN@aol.com
All Rights Reserved

One lonely, dark and stormy evening I'm home alone. After taking a long and luxurious bubble bath I wrap myself in a short satin bath robe. Unexpectedly there's a knock on my door. When I answer it you are standing in my doorway holding a medium sized paper bag in your hand. Pleased with your surprise visit I let you in and close the door. Before I knew what happened you have dropped the bag on the floor and have pressed my near nude body against the door. With my back against the door and your body pressing against me, you kiss me. Passionate, sex hungry kisses. The kind of kisses that can only lead to a night of wild uninhibited fucking.
This sudden unexpected outburst of sexuality has caught me off guard but is not unwelcome. I respond by running my fingers through your hair and up and down your back. You open my robe and let your hands roam all over my bared flesh. Caressing my soft thighs, grabbing my ass, and just generally feeling me up like the lust crazed lover I know that lurks deep within you. In turn I begin to rip your clothes from your body. Pulling at your pants, tugging at you shirt, then finally pulling it over your head. Once again you press your body against mine, kissing me fiercely. My soft breasts are pressed against your chest and you can feel my harden nipples tickling your body. Your hand wanders between my legs and begins to caress my moistened slit. My pussy feels so soft and wet in your hand. As your middle finger instinctively slides inside my honeyed fuck hole, my warm juices begin to flow .
You break our kiss and look deep into my eyes and tell me, "Baby, I want you to give me a preview of what my kisses will taste like for the rest of the night". And with that you withdraw your finger, dripping with my sweet arousal and put it in my mouth. I close my eyes and my soft luscious lips surround your finger and you feel my tongue licking off all my sweetness. It is a very erotic moment. Only a few minutes earlier I was calmly taking care of mundane everyday chores but then suddenly without warning I have been swept away into a world of overwhelming raw sexuality, and lust and now I'm standing here with a mouthful of my own pussy juice. And loving every second of it! As you take your finger from my lips, I let out a sex drenched sigh and look at you with a look of pure sexual excitement and wonder..."What's next", my eyes say to you, "I'm ready for anything your lustful heart desires....I'm yours completely".
You love having me this way. Completely stripped of all my inhibitions and aroused beyond belief. You put your hand back down between my legs and slide your fingers up inside my slippery love canal and stir my juices around inside me. This time when you withdraw your wet fingers you smear the juice all around my mouth making my lips glisten. Then very slowly and sensuously you lick my lips and push your tongue inside, kissing me deeply. My entire body melts into your arms. My robe has long fallen off my shoulders. As you grab my ass and lift me up, my legs encircle your waist as we kiss passionately. Carrying me in your arms you take me to the bedroom and throw me on the bed.
"Stay right there" You tell you, as you go to retrieve your magic bag of tricks. When you return you see I have cast my robe aside. Lying there naked on the bed, I look so sexy. You remove the rest of what little clothes you have on and climb on the bed, straddling my hips. From the bag you remove a can of whipped cream and a container of cling peaches in heavy syrup. You take a slice of peach and put half of it in your mouth and then bring it to my lips so we can share it in a kiss. As I bite the other half, we kiss. You then open the can of whipped cream and tell me to open my mouth and stick out my tongue. Holding about a few inches from my mouth you squirt. Mmmmm....
You kiss me again and then squirt a little more cream on me. This time on my nipples and then proceed to slowly lick it all off. Pressing my soft breasts together you kiss and lick my nipples, enjoying the sweet sensations as my beautiful nipples become hard in your mouth. Again you squirt more cream on me. This time in a trail down my belly, filling my navel and down to your pussy. Which makes me tremble in anticipation. From my breasts you lick every drop of that creamy trail. Licking every drop from my belly button, then down to my sweet pussy. Spreading my legs you place yourself between my soft thighs. "Oh baby, you look sooooo delicious this way." The cream has trickled down right down the middle of my sweet slit. You take a slice of peach and gently slide it through my wet lips and insert it completely inside me.
And now comes my favorite treat. You press your lips to my juicy lips, kissing my pussy and then finally sucking that sweet piece of fruit into your mouth. As you bite down on the peach an erotic taste explosion of peach and my sweet flavor spreads through out your mouth. As the delicious combined flavors slide down your throat I know you want more of that. You take another slice of peach and slip it inside me. You then squirt more cream all over my pussy lips. This is the sweetest treat you've ever tasted and you take your time to savor my precious dessert. With my legs wide open, cream all over my pussy, and a fat slice of peach deep inside, you slowly lick all the cream off my pussy. It tastes so delicious but you take care to do it nice and slow.
You want me as aroused as possible because you want my pussy as wet as it has ever been. To marinate that sweet piece of fruit in my own sweet juices. You press your lips to my pussy and begin to eat me feverntly. Your hard, wet, tongue laps at my juicy love hole. Licking my lips and sliding deep inside my sweet pink pussy. Licking up all the cream. Tickling my clit, your tongue swirls around and around driving my overflowing honey pot into a juicy wet, cock hungry, fuck hole. Finally you want your special treat which I have so graciously contributed my own delicious flavors. You press your lips to my sweet pussy and suck lustfully. As you do I squeeze those pleasure muscles between my legs and feed you the most exotic, erotic, dish you've ever tasted. As the sweet slice of peach slips into your mouth, sopping in my liquid candy, you slurp up all the remaining juices from your tender pussy, Mmmmmm it tastes so good!
You climb on top of me and place the juicy head of your dick at the entrance to the wet wonderland and push it deep inside me. As you fill every warm, creamy inch of my juicy fuck hole I feel completely feminine and totally consumed. As your thick, hard, dick firmly slides in and out of my tight pussy, you hold me down by my wrists with your hands and kiss and lick my face and neck, a sensation of total femininity and surrender washes over my body. I am being ravished and sexually devoured and loving every minute of it. Before long that sweet feeling in my pussy begins to grow and grow. My hips are rising and falling in response to your thrusting pelvis. Your plunging rock hard dick has pushed my tight little pussy past the point of no return. My soft thighs begin to tremble as pleasure spreads all over my body. I cry out as I cum, and cum, and cum!
My hot pussy spasms over and over again. Tightening around your dick like a vise grip. The sensations of my juicy pussy cumming, brings on your orgasm. But you want you to see the fruits of your labor, so you pull your dick out and in the cool, open air right above your pussy, it jumps and jerks and then squirts your creamy love potion across my soft belly and tities. A trail of cum leads from the tip of your dick right up to my nipples. I feel so erotically delicious this way, freshly fucked, bare assed naked, legs spread wide open, and all your creamy cum glistening all over my naked body.
You then take another slice of peach, and drag it through the droplets of cum on my naked body and then slip it into my mouth. I close my eyes, bite down on the peach, and enjoy the flavors of a passion fruit and a passionate man and savor the delicious flavors. Mmmmmmmmm!

The Barber Shop
By Zane
Copyright©1998
AOL Screenname: Endeavors
All Rights Reserved

Enough was enough! I had tried everything imaginable to get the brotha’s attention short of hanging a sign on my back saying, “Take Me, I’m Yours”. I first met Keanu when I took my little brother, Darwin, to The Cutting Edge Barber Shop to get a fade one Saturday morning.
I sat there pretending to be enthralled in an issue of Sports Illustrated while all the men cackled on and on about this honie or that honie. Movie stars mostly who wouldn’t give any of them nuccas the time of day and would gladly invest in a vibrator before giving it up to any of their busted asses.
This one snaggled-tooth brotha was sitting in the corner, waiting his turn and bragging about how he could turn Halle Berry out. I started to interject my two cents and tell his ass to get real. There he was in his plaid shorts, white sleeveless undershirt, black penny loafers and white tube socks with red stripes bragging and boasting about how he could fuck a sista so hard she would beg for mercy. I started to tell him, "A sista will lsimply look at your ugly ass and beg for mercy."
By the time Darwin finally got into a barber’s chair, I couldn’t take snaggle-tooth's bama ass anymore so I told him, “Negro, please! Noone wants your skank ass!”
That did it! I had managed to be incognito up until then, hiding behind the pages of the mag but once I spoke some words, it was like every nucca in the place suddenly noticed there was pussy present. All of them except for Keanu. His fine ass didn't even look my way. He was too busy shaping up this knucklehead who kept winking at me and doing that 'I-want-to-lick-the-lining-out-your-pussy' motioning with his tongue.
I don't know whether the pigmy in Keanu's chair drew my attention to him or the fact he didn't so much as give me a sideways glance but I knew right then and there I had to have it.
I am not sure how many of you sistas can relate but there are times when you see something you simply must have and you know from jump you will move heaven, earth and any hoes lurking around out the way to get it. That is how I felt when I first spotted Keanu.
About 6'2", cafe au lait, enough muscles to lend three other brothas some and still be the bomb diggity, cinematic smile, neatly shaven and bald as a baby's ass. Not the kind of bald where the nuccas head is shaped like a peanut or a gigantic, elephantine football but the sexy kind of bald.
Before I could really get my erotic daydream going about his ass, Darwin's head was cut and the barber who cut it was in my face holding his hand out for his ten bucks. The one who cut Darwin's hair, Randy, was not fine. In fact, his ass was not hitting on nothing at all but his foul, au natural breath made me want to shove a clove of garlic down his throat to improve the aroma.
When we walked by Keanu's chair on the way out, I tried to give him the eye. You know the eye that tells a man you want to give him a candlelight bubble bath and then lick his ass dry. He didn't even glance my way. Now granted I am not the finest sista on the planet but I was accustomed to getting mad play and frankly, I was offended by the fact he didn't even blink in my direction.
It was all good though because by the time we walked the three blocks home, I knew Keanu's ass was in for it. I was going to get that dick if I had to camp outside of that barber shop and kick tramps to the curb to get to him.
The next day I waited for the shop to close and I was standing outside, under a dim streetlight, with the hoochie dress of all hoochie dresses on smiling and profiling for his benefit alone. He looked at me, grinned and then walked in the other direction. I was about to follow him when this damn wino came up to me and offered to trade me a half-empty bottle of Thunderbird for a blow job. I missed my opportunity that night because I was too busy telling the drunken bastard to get the hell out of my face while Keanu was pulling out of the lot in his silver BMW Z3.
Okay, so maybe the all out 'fuck-me-like-you-hate-me' approach was a bit overkill. I decided to try the subtle approach next. I found out he attended Bethel Baptist Church and followed his ass there. I sat beside him in the pew, nonchalantly rubbed my thigh up against his and even shared a hymnal with him while the congregation sang "Amazing Grace" but as soon as church service ended, he was ghost.
That's when I began to wonder if my honey was funny but I quickly decided even if he was a homie-sexual, I was going to bring his ass on back to the nana. He was mine, all mine. He just didn't know it yet.
I masturbated day in and day out thinking about this nucca and something had to give. There are only two ways to deal with any type of frustration. You either have to accomplish your goal or give up on the idea completely. The same rules apply to sexual frustration but I was not about to give up so........
.....One Tuesday night, I waited until he was in the shop alone. In fact, he had already locked up for the night. At first, I tapped on the door lightly, like a cat scratching to get in which was not that far off base because my kitty was damn sure purring. When he didn't answer the door, I banged the shit out of it until he raised the shade a little and peeked out.
He pointed to the sign on the door stating the hours of business but I told him, "Please, I need to get a quickie!" I meant that shit literally too.
Keanu unlocked the door and countered, "Miss, we're closed for the evening."
"My name is Tammy, not Miss, and this won't take long. I just want a quick shape-up."
We stood there for a brief moment, staring in each other's eyes and I noticed his were a dark gray. My punnany heater meter went up ten degrees.
"Okay, I guess I can shape you up real quick." He grinned at me and stepped aside to let me in.
Now ordinarily it would seem strange for a woman to go to a barber shop for a shape up but my do is short. Any shorter and it wouldn't be a do but a don't so I wasn't too obvious since my hairdresser did use clippers on it.
He motioned for me to get into his chair and then went to get a smock for me to put on. I waved it off and told him, "I won't be needing that."
He looked at me dumbfounded. "You should really wear this so it won't mess up your clothes."
"Don't worry. My clothes won't get messed up." With that, I let down the straps of my black sundress and let the bad boy fall to the floor, revealing my naked as a Butterball turkey ass.
That's when something came over him. Maybe he realized freaks really do come out at night. He giggled and blushed nervously. "What are you doing?"
I bit my bottom lip and grabbed him by the chin so he would look me in the face. "Getting ready for my shape up."
Then I sat in his chair and spread my legs, letting each one dangle over the sides and my pussy was so exposed, you could have taken pictures of my fallopian tubes from thirty feet away.
"Have you ever had a woman do something totally freaky to you?" I ran the fingers of my right hand through my baby fine pubic hair and then played with my clit, gliding my middle finger in and out of my pussy walls. "I was wondering if you could shape this up for me?"
He hesitated, then gleamed like a lighthouse beacon. "I'm a professional barber. There's nothing I can't shape up."
"Kewl! Then get some shaving cream and a razor and get to work."
He silently obeyed my wishes and I couldn't help but notice the sudden pep in his step as he gathered all his shaving equipment. He stepped on the bottom of the chair, pumping it a few times to make it go higher on the riser and then pulled up a wooden chair. He sat down, positioning himself between my calves and then grabbed the heels of my black 9 West pumps, the only thing I had on, and spread my legs open even wider.
"UMMMMMM, you like this huh," I asked him, still playing with myself with my right hand and lifting up one of my breasts with my left one so I could flick my tongue seductively over my hard nipple.
"No damn doubt about it," he responded and then removed my hand from my pussy, holding it by the wrist and licking the juice off my middle finger. He drew the entire thing into his mouth and then let it out slowly.
"UMMMMM, that's what I am talking about. Let's get jiggy with it."
He laughed. "Yeah, let's!"
He mixed up some shaving cream and then gently spread it on my pussy, commenting as he went along. "You know, I have never shaved a woman's pussy before but I have often dreamed about it. I think it is sooooooo sexy."
"Well, I am living proof that sometimes dreams do indeed come true." I reached out and started rubbing his sexy ass bald head while he gently and methodically started to shed my vagina of its fur. "I wanna see it. Hand me a mirror."
He complied and then I held the mirror at an angle where I could watch him go to work. Five minutes later, my coochie was officially free like a runaway slave and I was ready to get to the good part.
"You did an excellent job. Thank you!"
"No, thank you. The pleasure was all mine."
"Would you like me to take my legs down now or did you want to do a closer inspection of your work?"
He knew the dilly. "No, don't take them down. Hang on a sec while I get a towel."
I knew it was coming. The dick I had been helplessly craving. He came back with the towel, wiped the remaining shaving cream off and then positioned the towel beneath my ass cheeks.
Brotha man must have had the muchies because he wasted no time eating his late night dinner and I think I came about five times in twenty minutes. He spread my pussy lips open with his long fingers and then gave me one hell of a tongue-lashing with his thick juicy tongue. He was so starved and eating me up like Pacman devours dots, I pondered whether he might have smoked a dime bag of weed before I got there
"Rub your head in it," I instructed him and when he placed that shiny, cafe au lait, bald head deep in between my cum-drenched thighs and rubbed it around, it looked like a glazed doughnut that put Dunkin to shame.
I grabbed the back of his head and pushed his tongue deep into my pussy. I am surprised I don't have his facial features branded into my vaginal lips to this very day.
This went on and on, the only sounds in the shop being my moans, his moans, his sucking and the irritating second hand on the wall clock. By the time he was done, the towel beneath my ass was drenched.
"Fuck me," I requested.
"I fully intend to. I am going to fuck the living daylights out of you."
He stood up and I helped him whip his dick out faster than a ninja whips out his sword. It was just like I love them to. I have a predilection for big dick men and he definitely fit the bill.
He pulled me by the heels of my shoes again, like they were the joysticks on an arcade game, and repositioned my ass closer to the edge of the chair so he could get to the good stuff easier. I grabbed the head of his dick and directed it where I wanted it to go. My vagina burned a little at first because minute particles of the shaving cream probably went in with his dick but I didn't care. After all, that's why they make Monistat 7. I wanted it all. I got it all.
He pushed it all in and lifted my legs up in the air, working the hell out them joysticks and fucked me without mercy. He leaned over and grabbed a hold of one of my nipples with his teeth and worked me all over. No, this was not a homie-sexual. This was a superhero. A man's man. A hoochie's delight.
"Aw yeah, take this pussy baby!"
"Where do you want my to take it?"
"To the bridge." We both laughed, realizing how corny we were being but the sex was the bomb.
He took his dick out and told me to stand up and turn around. I bent over the chair so he could hit it from the back. Boy, did I get into that shit then. I put one knee up on the worn leather of the chair, grabbed a hold of the neckrest and worked my pussy on his ass.
He grabbed me by the shoulder, taking it deeper and I started howling like a damn dog. At first, I was wondering what or who was making those noises and then I realized it was me and Cujo wasn't waiting outside the door afterall.
Keanu started babbling. "Oh shit! Oh damn! This is some good ass pussy! Oh shit!"
That's when I knew he was about to shoot the mother load. Damn, did he! He pulled it out and came all over my ass so much, I needed about four other sistas' asses for backup purposes.
We rested up for a good fifteen minutes. Okay, make it two and then I went to town on his dick. It was amazing. It was spectacular. It was a fucking miracle, the way I sucked his damn dick. I wish we had a camcorder rolling because I could have sold that shit on the Internet and clocked some serious dollars. I never knew I had it like that. Sheit! I would have made my girl Kandi, a part-time college student and part-time call girl, jealous as a mug."
Keanu started babbling again as I sucked the life out of his loins. I caught a rhythm, relaxed my throat and let the head of his dick bang up against my tonsils until he exploded, lining my stomach with some Negropectate.
We feel asleep that night, right there in his barber chair, with me sitting on his lap with my legs hung over an armrest. When the sun came up, Keanu fucked me royally again on the rinky-dink table covered with sports and skin mags. We had to end up throwing all those back issues away because the pages were stuck together by a foreign substance, if you get my drift.
Keanu and I have been dating seriously for nine months now and I am not letting his ass go anywhere. I don't have to pay for hair cuts anymore, my pussy stays smooth as silk and my sex life is all that plus a buck fifty. I may have stretched it a bit when I called him a superhero since he can't fly and he can't shoot spider webs from his wrist. He may not be a superhero but he is damn sure a super man.

This concludes the end of my October/November Newsletter - Part One. If you do not receive Part Two, please let me know.

Peace,
Zane

Endeavors Erotica Newsletter
Volume Five
Part Two
October/November 1998

Welcome to the 5th Volume of my erotica newsletter !
If you would like to be removed from my mailing list, simply put
"REMOVE ME" in the subject line and email me at endeavors@aol.com
If you would like to be added to my mailing list, simply put "ADD ME TO YOUR LIST" in the subject line and email me at endeavors@aol.com
This newsletter is in two parts. If you only receive one of them, let me know.

In this issue, you will find:

PART ONE
Sexual Questions of the Month
Sex Gadget of the Month
Book of the Month
Herbal Aphrodisiacs
Peaches and Cream by SINSUALWMN@aol.com
The Barber Shop by Zane

PART TWO
Web Sites of the Month
Links to Stories by NJBLKLOVE
Homonymic Orgasms
Nymph by Zane
Links To Other Erotic Stories and Sites

Enjoy this month's newsletter and see you next month !
Peace,
Zane

Web Sites of the Month
Erotic Furniture - KINKY JOE'S CASTLE
For those with a foot fetish - Pretty Black Feet - Souls with Soul!
U.B.W.A - UNCENSORED BLACK WRITERS ASSOCIATION

Speaking of the U.B.W.A., it gives me great pleasure to present erotic adventures by the founder, NJBLKLOVE.
HOT BUTTERED PUSSY
BLACK MASSAGE
BLACK TO NATURE
To view more of his works and many others, please visit the following web site as well as the one above
BLACK EROTICA

Homonymic Orgasms
Newlyweds get: "soregasms"
Nymphos have: "let's-do-it-some-moregasms"
4WDrivers usually experience: "four-on-the-floorgasms"
Salesmen have: "door-to-doorgasms"
Virgins scream out: "my-hymen-got-torgasms"
I know of no one who has: "I-abhorgasms"
Goalies have: "scoregasms"
I was married to a man who had: "snoregasms"
(well, that was *his* excuse)
Golfers have: "foregasms"
Hockey players have: "Bobby Orrgasms"
Mushrooms are limited to: "sporegasms"
And Marco Polo had: "exploregasms"
Premature ejaculators have: "beforegasms"
Selfish men have: "I-got-mine-you-get-yourgasms"

Nymph
By Zane
From The Sex Chronicles
Copyright©1998
AOL Screenname : Endeavors
All Rights Reserved

My name is Page and I am a nymphomaniac, a sexual thrill-seeker, a sexual renegade. I love "playing with fire", living a life full of drama and excitement, defying all the "good girl" rules, approaching situations that are both sexy and perilous. I am a sexual rebel and to me, danger itself is the most tremendous sexual stimulant of all.
One night, I was at a club and this sorry excuse for a man asked me was I pure. I asked him, "Do you mean pure as in pure chewing satisfaction?" He was dumbfounded so I added, "Unless you want to suck on this pussy tonight, get the fuck!"
Like most men, he was intimidated by the sexual prowess I exude. Men like him disgust me because they brag about how they are all that in bed and can make a woman scream out their name when half the time they have trouble even finding the clit. As for the g-spot, forget about it. They couldn't find a woman's g-spot if she handed him written down instructions and a map.
Fortunately for me, there are plenty of "mad fuckers" around too. A "mad fucker" is a man who doesn't talk about turning a sista out. He just does it. A "mad fucker" is a man who's cum tastes so damn good, it makes a sista feel drunk. A "mad fucker" is someone who fucks a sista so hard, the next day her pussy and nipples are sore, she has a helluva stomach ache and has trouble sitting down. That's how you know you've been the victim of a
"mad-fucker" driveby.
Sex to a nymphomaniac is like doughnuts to a police officer. We both gotta have it. My body is so accustomed to cumming, if I don't have at least three orgasms a day I feel sick. Sometimes, when there is no man around, which is extremely rare because I have more male bitches than the electric company has switches, I make myself cum through the art of masturbation.
Masturbation is damn sure an art too. Everyone can't do that shit like a master. Those of us who have acquiesced the amateurs masturbate so well, sometimes it seems like we are actually fucking. I often wonder why people feel it is more kosher and acceptable to touch the private parts of someone else than their own. Silly as shit, if you ask me. If you don't want to play with your own coochie coo, why should a man?
I play with my whole body like it is a trivia game. What is the strongest part of a woman's body? Her tongue. What are the most sensitive parts of a woman's body? Her tits and clit. Where do women like a man to insert a finger during sex? In her ass. What is a woman's favorite sexual position? Doggystyle. What parts of a woman's body should be sucked and licked on during foreplay? All of them bad boys.
When it comes to sucking dick, move over cause there's a new sheriff in town. I can just picture a big juicy dick in front of my face right now. Slobbering all over it, making those slurping sounds, teasing it around the tip just before I deep throat the whole thing, bouncing my head up and down as I catch a good rhythm, licking and gently sucking on the nutsack, swallowing every last drop of cum. Ummm, damn, makes my pussy ache just thinking
about it.
There have been several "mad-fuckers" in my life. Starting way back in high school with Ryan. I remember one Thanksgiving, he invited me over his parents' house for dinner. After dinner was over, everyone except the two of us went downstairs in the family room to watch a football game.
Ryan and I were supposed to be cleaning off the table and washing the dishes but we got sidetracked. Ryan took me off guard by forcing me up on to the dining room table, sitting in the chair between my legs, pushing my panties to the side and starting to fuck me with a roasted turkey leg. After he fucked me with it, he ate it down to the bone.
Ordinarily, the notion of being screwed with a greasy ass turkey leg would be unappealing to me but the fact his family was just a split-level away cheering for their respective football teams to win turned my ass on. That was the first sign I was kind of out there.
Then, I started a scrapbook in high school where I kept everything from nude photos of myself and some of my menz to a male pubic hair collection and even a collection of used condoms with the guys names written beside them in the book. My friends thought I was a true freak and they were right.
There were other signs as well, omens so to speak of what I would be like as I got older. I used to wear teddies under jackets to school with no shirt and flash the boys. My Sex Education teacher made me go to the principal's office for bringing a small vial of Ryan's sperm to class as a visual aid for my project on the reproductive system.
I was so desperate to go to a sold out Prince concert one time, I bet these two guys I could sit on their dicks without making a noise in exchange for a pair of tickets. I couldn't sit on their dicks without making that "dick-slapping-against-the-pussy-walls" noise but I fucked them both big time and they gave up the tickets anyway.
Yeah, I was a bit out there in high school but that's what growing up is all about. My senior year in high school was the year I discovered watching others having sex was just as big, if not bigger, a turn on as doing the nasty myself. I am quite the voyeur.
Camcorders were not popular back in the day so, when I couldn't actually witness the act, I would ask my gurls to audiotape their sexual escapades for me so I could cop a listen. My gurls were wild also but nowhere near as off da hook as me.
Four of us had a female singing group called Rough, Ready, Sexy and Steady. We used to prance around in my gurl, Winnie's living room after school in lingerie singing everything from Teena Marie to Vanity 6.
When I got to college, my sexual rebellion really took off. Freshman year, I joined the sweetheart court for one of the fraternities on campus. Once again, another year brought with it yet another revelation. My freshman year, I discovered I like trains and I don't mean Amtrak. The only think better than one good dick is ten good dicks. The more the merrier!
I used to have men wait in my gurl, Cherise's dorm room, which was down the hall from mine, until it was their turn. One day, I had so many men waiting to hit this, some had to wait out in the hall. Hell, I even had my manager from the fast food restaurant, who was a married man, up in that bitch. It's all good though. Often times, married dick is the best dick of all.
Don't turn your nose up at me because I fuck other women's husbands. I never took vows with and promised to love, honor and respect no damn body. I can tell you this much though. I am the woman your mother warned you about. Don't let me in your house because if he is fine, I will take your man. If I borrow a pair of shoes, your best bet is to make me throw them bad boys out the window of my car at 50 mph cause if you let me in, I am leaving
with more than some 9 West pumps. And don't let your man have some of that "turn-your-ass-out-Alabama-black-snake-make-a-pussy-scream-out-his-daddy's-name- dick". Forget about it! I am going to fuck his ass everyday, married or not. Well, at least I am honest. Most women will just go behind your back and do it. I am telling you my plans straight up.
Am I a freak? Hell yeah! Do I care what you think about me? Hell no! You can kiss my black ass. As long as there is a breath in my body and I can spread my legs, I am gonna get some dick.
My favorite "mad-fucker" of all time was Sutton. Sutton was this dude I met at the house party of all mutha fuckin' house parties. A friend of mine, Faye, was house-sitting for a wealthy couple on the upper crust part of town. The house was the bomb. It had eight bedrooms, a circular living room, a full staff of servants and both indoor and outdoor swimming pools.
There were a good hundred people at the bash Faye threw, the food was slamming and the bars were stocked with enough liquor to fuck everyone up. I had on a black hoochie dress which was covering up my black thong bikini. Yes, I did say hoochie dress and "Hoochie" happens to be my middle name.
Anyway, I was in the basement level chillin with some of the peeps around the indoor pool. The pool had a brick bar, at water level, going along one entire side of it. There was also a sitting area with a leather sectional sofa and bearskin rug in front of a huge fireplace with a roaring fire.
I was sitting on the sofa, tore the hell up, listening to the kicking ass music emitting from the speaker system wired into the walls of the entire house. Some girl was trying to talk me into letting her eat me out and, to be honest, I was about ready to take a walk on the wild side. I hear a woman can eat some pussy just as good, if not better, than a man. Sutton walked up behind us and was eavesdropping on our conversation.
He stated his objection. "Ladies, no need for all that. It would be my pleasure to devour both of you!"
"That's what I'm talking about!" I was quick to reply because he was definitely my type of "I-don't-give-a-flying-fuck-what-you-think" man. "I get to go first though. Bet?"
The other girl got mad. Apparently, she was strictly about the nana and didn't want a man doing shit for her so she got up and walked away, cussing under her breath. Didn't phase me one bit since that meant more tongue action for me.
After thoroughly checking Sutton out from the top of his slick, bald head to his bulge to his satiny smooth skin, I was ready to get busy. He was about six feet even, built and F-I-O-N-E. The bald head just did my ass in though cause that's my weakness. He was wearing a pair of swimming trunks and nothing else which suited me just fine.
I was ready for him to dig right in and start eating me like the fabulous and delicious feast I am. Instead, he took me off guard. "Let's take a swim!" With that, he left me on the sofa, walked away and jumped into the pool. The way he squeezed his nose and yelled out before he jumped in reminded me of little boys jumping off a wooden pier at a lake.
I decided what the hell. Following a good dick around is a small price to pay for hellified sex. So, I seductively got up from the couch and pulled my dress up over my head as I switched towards the pool. My little show was not only for Sutton's benefit but for all the men in the room to witness. For a hoochie like me, every move I make is carefully planned out to be sexy and my entire life is a masquerade.
I continued my little show by sitting on the edge of the pool with my revealing thong bikini on and splashing the water around with my perfectly manicured toes. I used my hand to fling my hair back over my shoulder and all eyes were on me cause I got it like that.
Sutton was over by the pool bar. I got all the way in the pool and swam across it with the grace of a swan. He was ordering a drink from whoever was standing in as bartender at that moment. The guy behind the bar appeared to be drunker than everyone else put together. Sutton ordered a rum and coke and asked me what I wanted. I told the truth, "I want you!"
Our eyes met and he started blushing. I turned towards the bar and asked for a frozen strawberry daiquiri. I made sure to ask for an orange slice and cherry so I could show off my oral skills and boy, did I. As Sutton was watching, I took the cherry, arched my neck back and slowly dipped it into my mouth, sticking my long, pink tongue out to meet it. Then I chewed it seductively just the way I perfected it when I practiced at home on a regular
basis. I followed the cherry up with the big finale, the orange slice. I took the orange slice and put it in my mouth, letting the rind fill out the entire outline of my lips and then sucked on it and whispered, "Yummy!"
It was time for my pitch then. "I wonder if anything on you tastes as yummy." My eyes were locked on his dick like a missile locked on an enemy fighter jet.
He was still blushing. "Well, there is only one way to find out!"
I kept my head down but flashed my eyes up at his. "Ummm, do tell!"
Sutton took me by the hand and we walked along the ledge on the wall of the pool, carrying our drinks, until we got to one of the corners. I pressed my back into the contour of the corner, sat my drink on the tiled floor surrounding the pool and propped my elbows on the edge of the pool so my breasts would look even more enticing than they already are.
He put his hands around my waist, after sitting his drink down also. "Now, what's all this shit you've been talking missy? I bet you are all talk and no action, just like all the rest."
I took one of my hands, placed it in the water and starting rubbing his dick through his swimming trunks. "Try me!"
The pool had at least twenty people in it and another dozen or so standing around who all ended up getting an added treat because Sutton and I turned the house party in to a live sex show.
As our kisses began, Sutton picked me up and I locked my lengthy legs around his waist. He wasted no time untying the skimpy top of my bikini, removing it and letting it float away on the top of the chlorinated water. I leaned my shoulders back as his head moved down to discover the sweetness of my dark, hard pearls. While he was sucking my nipples, I noticed the same girl who had offered to eat me out standing on the other side of the pool
glaring at us. Thank goodness looks can't kill or I would be one dead hoochie.
After a few moments of him feeding off my breasts, pouring some of the frozen daiquiri on my nipples and sucking it off, I unwrapped my legs and stood down in the pool. I gave Sutton a peck on the lips and then disappeared underneath the water, pulling his swimming trunks down as I went. He kicked his trunks completely off and they too ended up floating on the water. I took his dick in my mouth under the water and started sucking on it . When I
took it all the way in and started deep throating it, his moans were exasperated by the echo of the water.
I stayed down there as long as I could without taking in too much water with my nose and then popped my head back up above the surface. I was not surprised to see everyone was now paying avid attention to what was going on and more people had even joined the crowd from upstairs and the pool outside. I could understand the thrill because I love to watch other people getting their freak on myself.
Sutton told me to turn around so I did and put my hands on the edge of the pool while he ripped my thongs off and threw them on the tile. He started caressing my rotund ass cheeks and pressing his dick up in between them. Then, he pulled my ass out towards him some more, knelt down a little in the water so the head of his dick could find my pussy lips and pushed it up in me.
I reached my right hand up over my shoulder and started rubbing his bald head while he fucked me slowly underneath the water. He picked up a steady pace, reached around and starting pinching my nipples. I was loving that shit!
People were saying things like, "Damnnnnnnnn!", "Look at this shit!" and "You go girl!" Then, there were the sexually repressed and threatened women who were urging their men to leave or go to another room so they couldn't watch. As usual, I didn't give a fuck about any of them cause I was getting mine.
The sensation of being fucked underwater made me cum within minutes but Sutton kept working his dick in me until my moans grew so loud, I almost scared myself. About ten or fifteen minutes later, he finally came all over my water-covered ass.
We spent the next few minutes caressing each other all over and asking some of the pertinent questions we should have been asking before we fucked like name, marital status, involvement situation, etc. After getting all that out the way, we realized neither of us had any balls and chains so it was all good.
Sutton suggested we get out the pool and go sit by the fire. As we walked over to the seating area, men were giving him high fives and slaps on the back like crazy. Most of the bitches were staring at me but my friend, Faye, the one giving the party was laughing her ass off. "Page, you are just too wild Sis!"
I just looked at her, curled my lips into a smile and kept on going. Sutton and I sat down on the bearskin rug by the fire, water droplets still covering us both because we hadn't bothered to dry off with towels. I started rubbing his dick up and down the shaft, hoping it would get hard again.
After some well-spent effort, it did and he fucked me again on the rug, in front of everybody, but in my ass the second time around. People are a trip. They always talk about the things they would never ever do in a million years but are gung-ho when it comes to watching it.
Sutton and I dated for a few months but he was in the military and was sent overseas so that was the end of it. We had the times of our lives while it lasted though and I miss him terribly. Life goes on, however, and so did my sexual escapades. You can't keep a sexual diva like myself down.
I only have one piece of advice. If you have a good man with a good heart and, most importantly, a good dick, don't let other women anywhere near him. One of these days, you might fuck around and let a nymph like me in the front door. Scary thought, huh? I am only one of many so, "YOU BETTER WATCH YOUR BACK!"

Well, this concludes my newsletter. I hope you all enjoy!
Peace,
Zane

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